Somehow my weight fluctuates often from 131 pounds to 138 pounds unsteadily. The most weight I’ve had on was 143 pounds.

I know, I know, numbers shouldn’t mean anything. But ever since I was on a workout schedule and drinking protein drinks and taking supplements, how much I weight becomes not only a reference of whether I am leading a healthy rutine life but also if I have a healthy state of mind.

But still I wanna say, damn, till now I have no idea the ages old electronic scale in the corner of the bathroom is working well or not. I’d weight #134 after a meal and later on at night #131. (I didn’t know a hanger steak in the stomach can weight 3 pounds?) Or I’d weight #135 in shorts and sneakers but #132 naked. (I also didn’t know sneakers, though might be very light, worn on feet can add up 3 pounds?) If I keep up my workout every other day and eat 4 times a day then I’d gain to #138, once I got upset about something or got lazy and drop out of the workout rutine and forgot to eat then I’d lost it to #132.

Man, just like Don Quixote and his windmill. It’s never going to end. I know the scale is probably not very precise. And when I am upset the red number shows after the beep says #131 will only upset me more. But I can’t help it. Every now and then I would just go in the bathroom and take off my clothing, stand naked on that damn stupid scale and wait for the answer. Last night, when it said #138 I didn’t even believe it.

I tried twice actually. #138, then I was skeptical but I was a bit happy. However, it was all gone, those weight,  by today. I got back to humble #134. Not too bad. And that’s more of a reliable number.

By no means that is to say that’s exactly how much I weight. I’ve weighted recently in a doctor’s as #140. But then I got really confused. Is his sacle working all right? Or is my scale fucked up? I DON’T KNOW. Does it matter? YES.

Yes. I wanted to gain back to #145. Well, the ideal would be #155. That will mean I have to go to the gym 3 times a week, have 4 meals a day, and in a good mood every single day.

Doesn’t sound too bad, does it?